Oh Flaabers.  Woe is me.  Something awful has just occured.  And by awful, I mean delicious.

Mini Cupcakes.  Delicious, wonderful, bite sized little cupcakes from hell, trying to make it so I won't fit into my party dress for my birthday party tomorrow!  We have Cookie Dough, Smores, Red Velvet, Oreo and Peanut Butter and Jelly flavors.  This is torture!!!

They appeared at my office like a gift from Satan himself.  In actuality they are a thank you for services rendered by the lawyers in my office, but still!  It's ruining my life!!!  And by life, I mean my ass.

Looks like I'll be doing an extra half hour at the gym today!

My dearest Flaabers and Flaabettes,

My name is Carly and I'm a Flaaber.  Actually, I was one of the first and one of the top Flaabers since this Flaabulous site was started last fall.  I am also a success story.

When I first came to Flaab, I was a bit of a chub.  I wasn't fat, but I certainly had some extra padding for winter.  Then, I discovered my Wii.  I became a Wii boxer, and then a Wii Fit fanatic.  I posted videos on Flaab all about it (feel free to peruse my earlier blogs and find them, I promise the laughs you will get from them will burn off a few calories) and tried to share my Flaab tips with the world.  These included my favorite songs to dance around to, best snacking options, and how to be Flaabulous on vacation.

However then I got lazy and left my wonderful Flaabers behind.  I moved to NYC, joined a gym, and luckily reached my Flaab weight so my evil ex roommated didnt' get my hard earned cash! 

Yet, I now feel the need to come back.  At almost 18 lbs lost, I feel a few of them creeping back up.  Almost 3 to be exact!  No!  The Horror!  Make it stop!  So imagine how happy I was to log back into Flaab a few days ago and see so many new faces!  I cant' wait to read how you all are getting bathing suit ready for summer and svelte for the year to come.

So my dear Flaabers, old and new, keep up the good work.  I will be looking out for your tips as well as throwing in a few of my own!  Let's all get Flaabulous together!

xoxo

Carly

Dearest Flaabers,

I am feeling a bit guilty.  I haven't been to the gym since SATURDAY!  Gasp!  The Horror!  I know.  AND, I can't go tonight.  Why, you might ask?  Well I will tell you.

Yours truly is starting a wine class tonight.  An 8 week course all about different types of wines, label laws, fermentation, all that fun stuff that goes into the making of the juices of the gods.  I believe Bacchus was the greek god of wine, and I plan on paying him homage over the next few weeks.  My wonderful, super awesome amazing parents got me this wine class for my birthday (which is in Saturday I might add, 24 years old!) and I could not be more excited.

However, this will seriously cut into my gym time.  So, here is what I propose:

Tuesdays will be an unhealthy day for me for the next two months.  So, Mondays and Wednesdays will be super healthy days.  I'm talking egg whites, lean chicken and fish, rice, salad with only balsamic vinegar on it, AND extra time at the gym.  I'm currently doing about 4 miles on the elliptical in about 45 minutes, and I'm going to add a mile on the treadmill.

Wish me luck!

Love,

Carly

Carly here, you're #1 Top Flaaber!  Great to see so many new faces in the land of Flaab!

It has been awhile my Flaabulous friends, but here I am again.  I realized recently that I may have gained back a few pounds recently!  Since moving to the wonderous city of Manhattan in February, eating healthy has become a bit more difficult.  While at home, my awesome mom would cook me food and make sure I was eating balanced meals.  But on my own, after working a full day and drinks with friends and dating and all that fun stuff, it's easy to pack on a few calories a day!  Also I get too lazy to cook starting at 7 pm when I'm getting home so ordering in take out, even healthy take out, seems like a good option.

However, I have also become a gym rat.  At least 3-4 days a week I drag my butt over to Crunch gym and rock out on the elliptical.  Yet, something more needs to happen.

So, I'm back on Flaab.  I'm going to eat right and work out more and maybe, gasp, stop having drinks with my friends because of the calories!  Well not on the weekends obviously, but during the week they might have to go.

I will be 24 next weekend (oh the horror!) and by the time I'm 24 and 1/2, I plan on being the hottest, sexiest, most svelte Carly I can be!

Wish me luck!

So tomorrow I leave for Chicago with my family to celebrate my Great Grandmother's 102nd birthday.  Yes, you read that correctly.  The old broad is 102 years old.  She was born on April 8th, 1907, and remembers crazy things like the Titanic sinking, Prohibition ending, electricity in homes and cars becoming popular.  She's pretty damn amazing, and still eats chocolate every day!

So my goal is to not gain any weight while away.  How will I do this?  By not eating like the little pig that I want to, AND I'm bringing my sneakers and workout clothes so I can go to the gym in the hotel!  Shocking, I know.  I'll report back with how it goes.

Wish me luck!

Why is it that at the gym, when you see a guy all covered in sweat it can be kind of sexy, but when it's a girl, she just looks sweaty and gross?

For some reason,  and I'm not entirely sure why, I have this sneaking suspicion that if I read my new gym contract closely enough, in the fine print there would be a line that states the following:

In exchange for your Crunch Membership, and the hundreds of dollars you will fork over to us this year in order to not be a lazy fatass anymore, Satan will also gain possession of your first born child.

I'm surprisingly alright with that.

Now, if Disney World is allegedly the happiest place on earth, then I think the Crunch gym on 59th and 2nd Ave in good old NYC is the scariest place on earth.  You may be asking yourself "why?" right now, as you should, so let me tell you the story of signing up for the gym.

It was a cold and windy March Monday in New York, and my roommate and I finally decided to take the plunge and sign up for the gym.  Bathing suit season is just a few months away, and i plan on looking smoking hot (or at least not flaaby) by then.  We walk into the gym, and are immediately greeted by a very large, long spiral staircase to get downstairs.  This staircase also wrapped around a giant climbing wall, with a guy scaling up the side.  WEIRD.

We get to the main desk, and are immediately confronted by 3 really hot guys with impossibly cut bodies smiling at us, all asking us if we need help and handing us forms to fill out.  Of course, the hottest of them all, Rich, takes possession of us and leads us over to his desk to talk about what we "need" from our Crunch experience.  When he asked us what we do now to keep in shape, my roommate and I really had no answer, and I was too dumbstruck to talk about my Wii exercises, so he just took us on the tour of the gym. 

Literally dozens of every type of exercise machine you could possibly imagine lined the first floor of the gym, many with personal tv's in front of them, some with racing games (the stationary bikes) and even a few you can check your email on.  I'm still unsure as to WHY you need to check your email while working out, but hey, to each their own.  I have to admit, I felt a bit ridiculous being shown around a gym while I was still in my dress and ankle boots from work, but I dealt.  Our litte hottie "tour guide" kept saying things like "Here at Crunch, we want to keep you entertained."  and "Our goal is to make working out fun!"  Um yeah, ok, I don't care how "fun" you think it is, it's still working out, and I'll still be sweating like a pig.

Then he showed us the studios.  I had to laugh.  They have so many classes at Crunch, that the studios look kind of funny.  The Spinning class studio was all dark with crazy lights, so I felt like I was in a club.  The "Anti-Gravity Yoga" room has these crazy hammok/swing/trapeeze things hanging from the ceiling.  My personal favorite was the Pole Dancing Room, that literally had about 20 poles from floor to ceiling.  It was a stripper's dream.

So then the hot tour guide took us upstairs to sign us up.  He's talking numbers and dollars and months and membership fees and personal training and I was frightened!  I'd never signed up for a gym before!

All I could think of was the FRIENDS episode when Chandler wants to quit the gym, because he never goes, and they use hot girls and jacked guys to not only convince him not to, but to convince Ross to join as well.  All I kept thinking was "I want to quit the gym!" and I hadn't even started yet!

So we got talked into it.  We signed the contracts (and my firstborn son to Satan away) and got our nifty new swipey card things to put on our keys to have them scan when we walk in.  Surprisingly, I kind of love the gym now!  I'm slightly addicted. 

I feel such a sense of accomplishment after working out for an hour, when I walk into the locker room, covered in sweat, literally dripping sweat down my body, wiping myself off with a towel and guzzling the last of the water in my Smart Water sports top bottle.  I've done 6 workouts in 9 days, and I think the endorphins are starting to get to me!

I had my first week at the gym last week.  In 7 days, I went 5 times.  I did a lot of the elliptical and the recumbant bike (you know the one that has a chair instead of a bike seat, it's like the lazy man's version of a spin class.)

Here is what my elliptical's fancy monitor looks like every day when I'm done with the first half of my workout:

Yes, you are reading that correctly.  33 minutes is how long my "fat burning" program is.  I burn 302.9 calories and do 4,388 strides in that time.

Not bad, right?

Back to the gym today,...

I, have done the impossible.  The unthinkable.  The unimaginable if you will.

I, Carly Nicole Herbst, have joined a gym.

Here are my keys with my brand new Crunch pass on it.

Now I know what you are all thinking.  "Carly, you bitch!  How can you cheat on your Wii?  And most importantly, how can you cheat on your adorable Mii, Carls, with her light blue dress and balls for hands that starred in so many fabulous flaab videos?"

Don't get me wrong, I love my Wii.  Nothing makes me happier than to do a little Wii Boxing to get my day going, or to play a little Hula Hooping or Ski Jumping on my Wii Fit at night.  However, I feel that my workouts have become stagnant.  I want more!

So I went through the terrifying experience of signing up for the gym (more to come on that later.)  They have all these super fun classes like Anti-Gravity Yoga (don't ask) and Pole Dancing (trying it later this week!)  Here is a picture of me with my brand-spaking new gym schedule:

It's been 3 days since the big sign up occured, and I've been to the gym 3 times, AND lost 2 pounds!

I am determined to be happy in my Bikini by my birthday (June 20th) so wish me luck fellow flaabers!

I spent this past weekend on a little vacation with my best lady friends.  We went out to Tucson, AZ where we spent 3 days just lounging in the sun, trying not to burn, and especially trying to NOT be self conscious in a Bikini.

Let's just say I need to get rid of that little belly pouch before summer arrives in NY!

At least I did get a super cool new neck pillow that looks like a giraffe for the plane ride home after being depressed about my "Not ready for a bikini body"

I've been bad.  I fell off the wagon a bit.  Gained back two pounds!  Oh no!  I am a failure!

Well not really, but I've been drinking too much.  Even if it's light beer, it's beer nonetheless!

My new goal for myself?  4 drinks a week.  Total.  Including wine, beer and my all time favorite vodka.  In total that is under 400 calories a week in alcohol, so I think I can do it.

Gotta lose those two pounds again!

As I walked to work this morning, I saw something that made me giggle.  Actually, it made me laugh, but I tried to stifle it into a giggle.

A guy rollerblading.  In pink Rollerblades.  Kind of like these.

At least he was burning Flaab!

After yet another dating disaster, I am back on the market in full force.  This one ended with a phone call (Yes, I got broken up with ON THE PHONE by someone I wasn't even officially in a relationship with!)  Rather than being sad, I'm going with pissed.  So that translates into more energy.  Which translates into more exercising, which translates into me becoming even MORE Flaabulous!

Let's be honest, we all get "swept up" sometimes in someone new, so now it's time for this flaabulous single lady to get swept off my feet by someone fantastic.  I will use my new, svelte self from all this flaabing to get out there and snag someone equally as Flaabulous!  Any other singles out there using their newly skinny selves to date?

 "I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people."  Rodney Dangerfield

Good point Mr. Dangerfield! 

Dear Flaabers and Flaabettes,

I write to you today from work.  I kind of feel like death.  Fever, stuffy nose, sore throat, the whole nine yards.  Yes, I am sick.  Yes, I revert to a whiny 5 year old when I'm sick.  Yes, I'm overy dramatic.

  Me sleeping at my desk

I just want to feel better!  On the plus side, I've had little more than vitamin C, water, tea and chicken soup in my system for about 2 days now, so I get the feeling I may lose another pound or two.  Health?  No.  Effective?  Yes.

Thanks New York weather for making me sick.  This is what happens when it's 55 degrees one day and 26 the next!  Stupid Global Warming.  I hate you Al Gore!  Everyone hope I get better soon, but not tooooooo soon so maybe it'll affect my Flaab!

xoxo

Carly

Just wanted to fill all you Flaabulous Flaabers and Flaabettes that I weighed myself again today, fearing that maybe I had gained back a pound or two (oh the horror!)

BUT, in fact, I lost another pound!

12 Pounds Lost!!!

Take that She Devil and Psycho Bitch.

Part 1 - First Dates

We've all been there.  You're going out to dinner for the first time with a guy.  No one wants to be the type of girl that just orders a green side salad with no dressing and a crouton on the side.  Especially not me.  I like to eat.  Then again, I don't want to seem like the fatty I am at heart and order a cheeseburger with fries and onion rings and mozzarella sticks like I really want on a first date and have a new guy think I eat more than he does in a day in one sitting.

So you need to strike a compromise.  Don't look like an anorexic Bimbo but also dont' look like a fat pig.  The solution?  Eat, but not a disgusting amount.  Wait until at least date 4 or 5 to let them know what you are REALLY like when it comes to food and flaab.

So on my last first dinner date (which of course came after 2 "drinks" dates) I tried to keep staying Flaabulous while not letting the new guy KNOW that I was "dieting."  We went out for asian food at this great little place in my new neighborhood.  I got a Thai themed dish of chicken with peanut sauce.  I figured the nerves I had at being out with a guy I liked would help me metabolize my food faster so it didn't matter what I ate.  At least that's how I justified it!

So what is my point here?  There is a fine line between scary and "normal" eating.  And beware that dating will throw a wrench in your Flaab!

Ah my dear Flaabers and Flaabettes.  My life is good.  She Devil and Psycho Bitch didn't get my money, I moved into a fabulous new apartment in New York City, I lost "some" of my flaab, and now, I have an awesome new guy in my life.

Alas, while the last part is fantastic, I fear it might put a kink in my Flaab progress!  Why might you ask?  It changes up my entire routine!  Now I'm going out to dinner more, doing less physical activity (alright, different physical activity) and basically have falled out of my normal Flaabulous lifestyle!

Now I'm definitely NOT complaining.  I couldn't be more excited about the new guy and all the awesome stuff we do.  He's great and I will not falter with my healthiness!  I'm learning to let it not affect my Flaab progress, so I'll be giving you all tips as to how to keep on being Flaabulous and sticking with your new healthy habits while dating!

Stay tuned!